Mike Topp

At first I didn’t mind living next door to a mad scientist but after a while I started to get irritated by the insane laughter coming from his laboratory at all hours of the day and night.

Has anyone else noticed the expanding universe?

Now just relax, take a deep breath, and try not to let your heart beat.

My friend from Waffle House says if you stacked all the sausage patties they serve in one day, it would reach the top of the Empire State Building. I say, why bother?

MOMS FOR LIBERACE !! WOODY WOODPECKER !! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE, PIGS !!

I found a wallet today that contained $200, some credit cards, and some family pictures—my family now.

For decades The Stuyvesant Bee has been a password known only to the LITERARY ELITE, whispered at CIA-sponsored cocktail parties, discussed in zoom meetings hosted by Paris Review interns, loudly recited at salons & saloons around the reading world.