Corporate encourages that we ride to work on company pogo sticks. Company bicycles and unicycles are also okay, but everything else is frowned upon. “We can’t force anyone,” the CEO laughs. Sheryl hates to bounce, rides in on a skateboard every morning. Everyone used to adore Sheryl, used to throw morning glories at her in the staff parking lot. Now co-workers spit on her as they pass her new office in the broken elevator full of fax machines. I remain a loyal employee, a pogo commuter covered head to toe in Band-Aids. My bruises and scabs are the only things that make my wife laugh. I take a pogo stick to work every morning and my poor balance never wins. I fall four of five times before sunrise and my work is only two blocks from my bed. My boss loves the commitment, adores the blood. Can’t stop giving me raises.
Benjamin Niespodziany is a night librarian at UChicago and has no idea how to ride a pogo stick. He spends his days running the multimedia art blog and music label [neonpajamas]. He recently released a chapbook of lofi poems known as Ants on Stilts and has had his work published in formercactus, Occulum, Ghost City Press, tenderness, yea, and a small handful of others. Find him: @neonpajamas or soundcloud.